Ahhhh, the drinking life. There’s nothing better, is there? Well, there is, but it sure can be fun to let loose and go on a little bender once in a while!
Here are some very entertaining tweets about boozin’ that I think you’re going to enjoy thoroughly.
1. Not yet in training.
If training for a triathlon doesn't include drinking margaritas and taking naps then that clearly explains why I'm not in training
— EnvyDaTropic™ (@envydatropic) March 13, 2015
2. Uh oh. Blew that one.
You're drunk and trying to outrun the cops on horseback but they eventually catch you because it turns out you're just on a carousel
— [crying in spanish] (@SortaBad) June 6, 2015
3. It’s good to be prepared.
How I significantly improved my Netflix pic.twitter.com/8EMjBI3PM1
— Mike Ginn (@shutupmikeginn) May 6, 2015
4. It’s called recycling.
So much of being an adult is bringing a bottle of wine someone brought to your house to someone else's house
— emily axford (@eaxford) July 25, 2015
5. Let’s start from the beginning.
Hearing about what you did drunk is great because you’re the main character in a story you’ve never heard.
— Nameless Network (@namelesstv) September 19, 2016
6. Most likely the case…
"I can do that. Hold my beer" – My last words, probably.
— Anna Kendrick (@AnnaKendrick47) June 18, 2013
7. You did it!
Every time I wake up in the morning after a night of drinking and I have my phone and wallet, I wonder what I did to deserve such a thing.
— Ashly Perez (@itsashlyperez) October 16, 2015
8. Might want to get that checked out.
I've been puking all morning… At what point am I aloud to stop calling this a hangover and just declare myself a fountain?
— Brett Osinoff (@BrettOsinoff) March 22, 2015
9. The future’s so bright…
You know you're hungover when you brush your teeth with your sunglasses on.
— Anna Kendrick (@AnnaKendrick47) January 27, 2014
10. That’s how I look at it!
Alcohol is like a push-up bra for your personality.
— Nicole Betz (@TomHanksIsHot) April 21, 2012
11. This is gonna be a team effort.
when u get too drunk at the club and everyone is like ummm lets get u home pic.twitter.com/bQLMVMLqTv
— lauren ashley bishop (@sbellelauren) June 14, 2015
12. A wine connoisseur.
Ahhh yes of course, I adore wine. I especially love [looks down at bottle of Pinot Grigio] peanut Gregorio
— Sage Boggs (@sageboggs) January 19, 2015
13. The man was very wise.
You should serioulsy ask that to every bartender you see tonight! Happy Friday!! pic.twitter.com/zrhBrZ7sH2
— World's Best Bars (@WorldsBestBars) November 17, 2017
14. Who am I?
I wonder if twins ever get really drunk and forget which one they are
— dan mentos (@DanMentos) April 27, 2015
15. That’s okay, though.
Vodka mixes well with everүthing, except decisions
— It's A Guy Thing (@ItsGuyThing) April 4, 2016
You a booze-hound?
Share some funny drinking-related jokes and stories in the comments!