Remember the good old days when people went to their local malls to get glamour shots?
Of course, you do!
You got all dolled up, put on some fancy duds, sprayed a ton of hair spray onto your head, and then smiled BIG for the camera.
And the results were usually…hilarious…
Let’s relive those days together with these wonderful glamour shots…try not to cringe too much.
A good chunk of these photos are from an Instagram account called Bad Glamour Bios . These folks find old glamour shots online and then give them very funny (fake) bios.
Let’s dig in!
1. Look at these two! Watch out for Tracy and Stacy!
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Follow these gals on Instagram: badglamourbios Sisters, Tracy and Stacy, love to power walk around town…and knows everyone’s business, especially when they peer through the windows on the walks. Others have tried to join their walking group, but if you can’t handle their speed, you can forget about it, “Isn’t that right, Jenny?” Both recently divorced, the girls get the hair and makeup ready and spend their Saturday nights at the Silver Star drinking moscato and singing karaoke to The Judds, “Why Not Me.” Safe word is Activewear. #glam #glamourshots #glamourgals #glamourphoto #glamourous #glamourphotography #90s #90shair #thejudds #gay #gayboy #instagay
A post shared by Clay (@badglamourbios) on Dec 20, 2018 at 8:15am PST
2. An interesting mother-daughter combo. Are you guys going to a leather bar?
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Follow these gals on Instagram: badglamourbios Mother-Stacy, 41 Daughter-Marissa 15, quiet the duo at the High School. Stacy has been known to use profanity towards other parents in the drop off line at the school, “Bitch, I will hit you if you try to cut in this line”…with a particular finger waving out the window. Friday night games can get heated when Marissa performs during half time shows at the foot ball games…Stacy’s in front of the girls doing the same performance, since she is the twirling coach, her favorite routine is to Cyndi Lauper, “Girls Just Want To Have Fun”…and since Marissa is head twirler, one drop of that baton, and Stacy is going to yell. Safe word is high-kick. #glam #glamour #glamorous #glamourshots #glamourgals #glamourphotography #90s #90sfashion #90shair #comedy #comedywoman #gay #gayboy #gaydaddy #instagay #twirling #twirler #batontwirling #safeword
A post shared by Clay (@badglamourbios) on Nov 7, 2018 at 6:21am PST
3. The Queen of Hearts. Need I say more?
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Follow these gals on Instagram: badglamourbios Jenny, 25, has gambled her tuition for the local junior college away at Jerry’s Bar, and has done some questionable acts for repayment, for that gambling habit. Her parents had dreams of her becoming a nurse, but she’s just worried about winning that next big hand at Texas Hold ‘Em. After her shift at the pawn shop, she’s ready to get home and get those cards dealt. She gets all dolled up, gets into her Ford Taurus, and jams out to Pat Benatar “Hit Me With Your Best Shot”…that just gets her pumped for the nights game. Watch out boys, she’s got her Poker Face on and an Ace in the Hole! Safe word is flush. #glam #glamourphoto #glamourous #glamourshots #glamourphotography #glamourgals #glamourshot #glamourshoot #90sfashion #90s #90shair #poker #pokerface #comedy #gay #gayboy #instagay
A post shared by Clay (@badglamourbios) on Oct 25, 2018 at 7:45am PDT
4. She’s a perky one! How would you like a night on the town with this one?
5. Oh, my… Viola has done it again!
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Follow these gals on Instagram: badglamourbios Viola, 78, spends her mornings at the YMCA doing water aerobics, and gossiping with the other ladies in town. Don’t get them started when Carl gets out of the water, they all blush. On Fridays, she goes down to Sue’s Beauty Shop to get the hair done, it’s a full day ordeal. Then she loads up the girls to go to The Catfish King for the Senior Special. Saturday evenings she is at Dukes Saloon, dancing with Carl to “I Fall To Pieces” by Patsy Cline. Sunday’s are spent in the choir section, she may doze off, just give her a nudge when it’s time to sing or pray. Safe word is Lycra. #glam #glamourphoto #glamourous #glamour #glamourgals #safeword #90sfashion #badglamourshots #90shair #90sphotoshoot #90sphotography #gay #gayboy #instagay
A post shared by Clay (@badglamourbios) on Oct 5, 2018 at 7:15am PDT
6. She doesn’t look very happy about all of this. She was dragged kicking and screaming to this photoshoot.
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Follow these gals on Instagram: badglamourbios Tina, 51, cashier at the Golden Corral. Lays in bed at night next to Jimmy, while he lights up a Marlboro Red, and thinks about where she went wrong in life. Mornings consist of a Keystone Light, listening to “Is There Life Out There” by Reba, and reminiscing on the year 1987, when she was crowned “Miss ‘87 Yam Queen.” Nothing gets her more excited, than after she has a few, and goes out in the front yard, and does her pageant winning “Riffle Twirling” with Jimmy’s shotgun. Safe word is fancy. #glam #glamourphoto #glamourous #glamour #gayboy #gay #instagay #safeword #reba #glamourgal #glamourgals #90sfashion #90shair #yamqueen
A post shared by Clay (@badglamourbios) on Oct 3, 2018 at 6:11am PDT
7. Heavily influenced by Debbie Gibson. Electric Youth!
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Follow these gals on Instagram: badglamourbios Ginger, 39, head perfume brand ambassador at Bealls. HATES Tax-Free weekend, “Cannot be combined with other coupons, ma’am.” On Friday nights, you will catch her driving down Main Street with the windows down of her ‘90 Pontiac Firebird jamming out to Bon Jovi “Living On a Prayer”. And don’t catch her at the four-way stop, you will get a show of some air guitar and head banging, don’t worry, that hair has enough White Rain to keep it up! When she makes it to the bar, she likes her LIT’s strong, just like she likes her men. Safe word is cucumber melon. #glam #glamourphoto #glamourous #glamour #90sfashion #90shair #90sphotoshoot #gay #gayboy #instagay #safeword #glamgal #glamourgirl
A post shared by Clay (@badglamourbios) on Oct 2, 2018 at 6:46am PDT
8. A real firecracker! Be careful with this gal!
9. All I can say is WOW. Are you tuff enuff?
10. Don’t mess with this family. If you know what’s good for you…
11. A man and his cat. They make a great team.
12. I’ll just leave this here. On the wings of love!
Those sure brought back some memories…mind you, I didn’t say “good” memories.
But memories, nonetheless…
Okay, now we want to see what you got out there!
In the comments, please, please, please share your glamour shots from days gone by with us!
We’ll hold you in the highest regard, we promise…now let’s see those pics!