How many times have you been asked this in your life…”so, what do you do for a living?”
It’s enough to drive a person crazy! And, unless you’re an astronaut or a CIA assassin or something, chances are that your response is pretty…boring.
But those days are over now! Thanks to a Twitter user named Jeremy Padawer, you can now have a little fun when you describe your profession.
Poorly explain what you do for a living.
— Jeremy Padawer (@JeremyCom) October 17, 2020
Let’s get silly with folks on Twitter and see how they answered this question.
1. I wonder what language it is…
Any guesses?
I teach kids in California how to speak a language that only .002% of humans speak, so they can talk to their grandparents.
— Preahkaew (@preahkaew) October 18, 2020
2. Hmmmm. X-ray technician.
This is hard!
I ask people what they mean by “it hurts” and “it feels numb.” I then hit them with a hammer. Later I may send them to a place where they get their picture taken, after which I often say I haven’t the slightest idea what’s going on, but they’ll probably be OK.
— Kenneth A. Vatz (@KenV54) October 18, 2020
3. History professor!
I think I’m right on this one.
I tell people who are 18-22 years old things they should have learned much earlier but America was too racist to tell them.
— Rebecca Hamlin (@hamlinr1) October 18, 2020
4. Survival tactics.
It’s best to be prepared.
I teach small children to light fires and use knives. And sometimes I tell them all to hide in the woods.
— Rachel Summers (@curiouswilds) October 18, 2020
5. Either boxing or MMA.
That’s what I’m thinking…
I help mildly dehydrated people in their underwear punch other such people within a metal enclosure.
— Coach Kavanagh (@John_Kavanagh) October 18, 2020
6. Teachers for the win!
Keep up the good work!
I silently judge 18 year olds for 5 hours a day, then I review their work and judge them again, but this time on a graded scale. I then I make lists of my judgements of them. Plus, I get to discuss economics and US Government all day.
— The Bitter Proffit (@bitterproffit) October 18, 2020
7. Now I’m stumped.
Could be a bunch of different things.
I poorly explain things for a living.
— John Pavlovitz (@johnpavlovitz) October 18, 2020
8. Writing can be tough.
Keep it up!
I constantly try to rearrange the 26 letters of the alphabet in new and exciting ways
— N.R. Walker (@NR_Walker) October 18, 2020
9. Sounds good to me.
And more people need to pay attention to you.
I try to explain why people shouldn’t vote against their own interests no matter what commercials say
— Rob Anderson (@RobAnderson2018) October 18, 2020
10. School bus driver.
It’s gotta be, right?!?!
I drive a planned course to pick up and drop off tiny humans at government funded centres. I pick them up and bring them home later
— Mike Matson (@MikeMatson67) October 17, 2020
11. What a job that must be.
All the world’s a stage.
Shout loudly, rhythmically, occasionally in tune and flounce about in someone else’s clothes in front of thousands of strangers.
— Socialist Opera Singer (@OperaSocialist) October 18, 2020
12. Short and sweet.
Thanks for doing great work!
Stick ppl with needles until i get blood
— Steve Harvey’s Old Wig???? (@MangoQQueen) October 17, 2020
Now we want to hear from you!
In the comments, explain your job as poorly as you can. Let’s have some fun!
Please and thank you!