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Funny women and Twitter go together like peanut butter and jelly. It’s just a perfect combination.
They routinely make us laugh our asses off with their witty observations and here are 15 more examples.
Let’s take a look and see what the ladies had to say this time!
1. Oh, that kind of D…
went for my annual checkup today and my new doc was like you need D, as in **vitamin D** and i was like god i know it's been a while and she was like what and i was like hwhat
— Delia Cai (@delia_cai) February 13, 2020
2. Just for you!
Girls our Uber is here pic.twitter.com/6RHDklj5aL
— Kelsie (@Kelsie) February 11, 2020
3. Party’s over.
When I tell a dude I want to have kids in two years
— Alison Agosti (@AlisonAgosti) February 13, 2020
4. You don’t have a side piece?
Y’all really out here with one boyfriend ? .. What if he die ? 🤔
— my name is lucille (@lucypapers) February 10, 2020
5. That was impressive.
spears are the opposite of swords fig. 1, there will be no additional figures in this presentation pic.twitter.com/TBgATiRmrH
— phat ass eater and retweeter (@tolntran) February 12, 2020
6. A total freak.
Gloppy from Candy Land was a fucking freak pic.twitter.com/hCwf5WGNpV
— 𝒞𝑜𝑜𝓁𝑔𝒾𝓇𝓁𝑜𝓃𝓁𝒾𝓃𝑒 (@6969_6969696969) February 14, 2020
7. Bull in a china shop.
Love going to a clothing store and having to walk around grabbing the biggest jeans from the bottom of the pile, fucking up the whole store like a tornado w a big ass
— Rachel Wenitsky (@RachelWenitsky) February 14, 2020
8. No problem, I got it.
stranger at the library: can you watch my stuff?
me: pic.twitter.com/rfm3KkLTT2— 𝒔 (@yungsids) February 12, 2020
9. That doesn’t sound right.
when a boomer says college used to cost $134 pic.twitter.com/lAKKh6IPTe
— ziwe (@ziwe) February 10, 2020
10. Think about it…
Sex is like pizza: if you’re having it at Domino’s, it’s time to re-examine the choices you’ve made that led you here
— Erin 😷 Ryan (@morninggloria) February 13, 2020
11. The cashier knows what’s up.
Cashier: Condoms and wine huh?
Me: Hahaha, yeah, baby. You know how it is.
C: …
M: …
C: You’re going to make water balloons and drink alone, aren’t you?
M: Just ring it up I’m not on trial here
— Arianna Bradford (@TheNYAMProject) February 12, 2020
12. You do you.
every time I remember to floss I reward myself with another 3-4 months of not flossing
— Dana Schwartz (@DanaSchwartzzz) February 13, 2020
13. Read this note.
This lady on facebook said her coworker had to have a conference with her sons teacher because of a note he wrote. Y’all. Please read the note. 😭😭😭 pic.twitter.com/oksT80EwKv
— Kennedy ✨ (@HelloKennedi) February 13, 2020
14. I said that’s enough!
Me at 13 when my parents said I couldn’t get another Donnie Darko poster: pic.twitter.com/PnfyiNdDfZ
— Alise Morales (@AliseNavidad) February 11, 2020
15. Wonder how that turned out…
awake at 2am on feb 14th, crying in bed because i’m so scared i’ll be horny for jim carrey’s eggman when i see sonic the hedgehog for vday. my boyfriend is rubbing my back trying 2calm me down “don’t be silly, of course u won’t be horny for eggman” but i see the doubt in his eyes
— 🌸alexis moore@ECCC e5 (@alexisparade) February 14, 2020
LOLs for a long time with these ladies!
Do you know of any hilarious women we should be following on social media?
Tell us about them in the comments, please!