Why do we fear rejection? Based on a very thorough and in-depth Googling, rejection is scary because we’re all social creatures who crave acceptance inclusion. When we’re rejected, it can make us fear that we’re fundamentally unlovable.
But one way to make rejection a bit less scary is by talking about. That’s what happened when Twitter user @captainkalvis prompted his followers to share their most embarrassing rejections. He started with a story of his own, about the time he tried and failed to appear exotic.
lol one time i asked a girl out and after an extremely awkward “no”, i realized we already booked the same 15 hour flight. sitting right next to each other. i make bad decisions.
— mordecai (@onetruemordy) September 16, 2018
Things got funnier from there. Here are 15 of the most cringeworthy rejection stories.
1. Can’t even give it away.
One time i was chatting with a guy who’s friend i was attracted to and so he called his friend over and i told him i thought he was cute and he laughed “thanks” and turned and walked away
— captain oblivious (@helenabadger) September 16, 2018
2. Never pass up a free meal.
One time I took a girl out in my class on a date (I know not a rejection story yet hang with me). We are eating dinner then a movie then I drove her back to the dorms. Once we see back I said “I would like to do this again” she said “no I just wanted a free night out”
— NoCleverNameWill (@RohlederWill) September 17, 2018
3. GOTCHA!
More of a WTF than a funny one, but one time a girl asked me out and instead of meeting where we’d agreed, she’d just drive by to see if I was there so she could go “ha ha, he actually showed up” to her friends.
— H van Dijk (@haraldvdijk) September 16, 2018
4. Pulling the ripcord.
One time I was making out with a dude and he went to take off my extremely stretchy pants but they got caught on my foot and sort of ended up slingshotting my foot into his face. He stopped, put on his shoes, and left, abandoning the rest of his clothing here.
— big pity goth gf (@animeweedfart69) September 17, 2018
5. Oh, Canada…
I was at an international performing arts festival, I was trying to prove to my friends that it is easy to make friends from other countries. I started talking to the group of Canadians, when I tried to sing “Oh Canada” to impress them, they all got up at once and left.
— Blair (@HairBlogan) September 16, 2018
6. It’s nice to see the “wrong number” move is still around in 2019.
idk if this technically counts as rejection but i once met a girl at a day long convention and hit it off but didn’t ask for her number bc she lived far away, but when we said goodbye she actually offered it herself so i took it and when i texted the number later it was wrong
— mate (@AlwaysAButt) September 16, 2018
7. Extreme conflict avoidance.
I had a boyfriend dump me via Facebook while we were both sat alone together in his bedroom lol
— ⛧L̶o̶z̶⛧ (@Lozy_xox) September 17, 2018
8. Getting soggy.
one time a girl made out with me so hard my nose started bleeding, and it was so dark I thought i thought it was snot or something. she stopped and was like “is that spit” and i just said “i don’t know”.
— shen the bird (@Shen_the_Bird) September 16, 2018
9. Daddy issues.
Once I really liked a coworker at a grocery store I worked at that was a few years older than me. With my I’m ~almost~ 21 confidence I would flirt w/ him on breaks, till he eventually set his hand on my shoulder and said “I don’t date younger women. I’d feel like your dad.”
— Jillian Coy (@still_ill_jill) September 16, 2018
10. Do you work here?
once at a bar these guys sitting at a table of like 6 people were making eyes and clearly talking about me so I walked over and said hey and they were like “oh good, can you clear some of these empty bottles the table’s getting pretty full” they fuckin thought I worked there
— sloane (sipihkopiyesis) (@cottoncandaddy) September 16, 2018
11. Try a little finesse.
I said “will you go to homecoming with me” and she said “that was blunt” before walking away and to this day I wonder how tf else you’re supposed to ask
— Kay (@itsshortforkay) September 17, 2018
12. The vomit-inducer.
not really funny perse but one time i told this dude i liked him and he asked/yelled “WHERE’S THE TOILET”, fake threw up, and walked away. i started laughing bc i felt so awkward
— cyrus ✪ (@buckywaititi) September 17, 2018
13. Anyone wanna switch seats? Anyone?
lol one time i asked a girl out and after an extremely awkward “no”, i realized we already booked the same 15 hour flight. sitting right next to each other. i make bad decisions.
— mordecai (@onetruemordy) September 16, 2018
14. You make me feel all lukewarm inside.
A guy stood for me up for a date. The next day I called and asked him why the fuck and he said, “ya know… I just didn’t feel like it. We can try again tonight. Maybe I’ll feel like it.”
— Shanna Merceron (@storiesbyshanna) September 17, 2018
15. Actually…why don’t we measure everything in life in “Danny Devitos.”
one time this guy on tinder messaged me that he was also 6 ft tall and I didnt know what to say so I was like “sick! together we’re 2.58 danny devitos” and then he unmatched
— lily (@LilyArnpriester) September 16, 2018
h/t: Bloomjoy Collective