Ready for more random, hilarious tweets?!?!
Of course you are!
That’s why this list is ESSENTIAL.
1. Nothing wrong with that
My personal style is best described as "didn't expect to get out of the car."
— Amy Dillon (@amydillon) February 16, 2015
2. True story
https://twitter.com/FeralCrone/status/567759753087299584?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E567759753087299584&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fpleated-jeans.com%2F2019%2F03%2F22%2Ffunny-twitter-jokes-7%2F
3. A good face
Mike Trout got a face like if I went to Lowe's and was shopping for a lawnmower and he was helping me, I'd know I was in good hands.
— 🦆✨America Is Musty✨🦆 (@DragonflyJonez) March 21, 2019
4. Sorry about that
me: no shoes in the house
murderer: sorry
— aaron yin (@aaronflarin) March 20, 2019
5. Good plan
In honor of Woodstock’s 50th anniversary I am going to shit on the ground
— grace spelman (@GraceSpelman) March 21, 2019
6. Agreed
Stop making new flavors of Diet Coke. The original flavor, chemicals, is already perfect.
— Alison Leiby (@AlisonLeiby) March 21, 2019
7. I’ve seen this a lot
ideal relationship: she goes inside to buy smokes while i pump $9 worth of unleaded gas into the car. she’s wearing pajamas and i’m wearing a jersey for a player who hasn’t played on that team in 5 years
— kelbin (@pissboymcgee) March 20, 2019
8. Those are the correct lyrics
https://twitter.com/JNalv/status/304345341535338496?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E304345341535338496&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fpleated-jeans.com%2F2019%2F03%2F22%2Ffunny-twitter-jokes-7%2F
9. How does that work?
spending $90 all at once: BAD
spending $30 three days in a row: somehow good
— common sad girl (@sadgirlkms) March 19, 2019
10. Too crazy
the crazy bread facebook page agreed to remove a pic of crazy bread after i reported it for being “too crazy” pic.twitter.com/IBeeeZeynT
— slick (@dlicj) September 11, 2018
11. It’s working
DATE: so tell me something about yourself
ME: i am older than every dog— ret (@rad_milk) January 18, 2018
12. It’s worth it
https://twitter.com/fredboycolor/status/1107273187425947656?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1107273187425947656&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fpleated-jeans.com%2F2019%2F03%2F22%2Ffunny-twitter-jokes-7%2F
13. Figure that out
wrestling movies: im sad and i have something to prove to my dad
actual wrestlers: my name is Nutbuster Mike and i dont care if i die— that can't be my name for real (@izaaking) March 17, 2019
14. Hahaha
You sit down on a couch in JK Rowling’s house and she’s like, “Careful, Dumbledore got railed there.”
— Louis Virtel (@louisvirtel) March 17, 2019
15. That is incredible
When my parents went to Ireland with my grandfather who hadn't been there in 25 years he took them to his favorite pub. When they went in a guy at the bar said "oh god he's back"
— captain glasses (@online_shawn) March 17, 2019
Still LOLing!!!!!!