We’re gonna make you sweat, folks!
Not, not like that! Get your head out of the gutter for once, will ya?!?!
We’re gonna make you sweat through laughter. And we’ll achieve that laughter by way of hilarious tweets.
So here’s the deal: you’ll look at these tweets, you’ll laugh hysterically, you’ll sweat, and you’ll feel like you just went to the gym.
And everybody wins!
So get started and get your sweat on right now! You’re welcome!
1. Doesn’t sound very realistic.
Why are you telling me this?
"model is 5'11 and wears size S" okay??? what does that have to do with me
— meredith (@dietz_meredith) April 12, 2021
2. We’re going to treat you like a baby.
I want to get this advice!
I spend all day hunched over so my doctor recommended “tummy time,” for me, like a baby, and tbh my back feels so much better. I can’t wait to start crawling and eat solid foods
— sarah schauer 🦂 (@sarahschauer) April 15, 2021
3. I thought all people from the Midwest were supposed to be nice…
What happened to you?
“I would have never guessed you’re from the Midwest” is code for “you’re a huge bitch”
— julia (@juliashiplett) April 11, 2021
4. This is absolutely disgusting.
How did you live with this person?
every time i drink milk i remember my roommate who used to put powdered milk in his milk so he could drink "more milk per milk"
— Avery Edison (@aedison) April 14, 2021
5. Heavy metal bands are now running our lives.
And I’m okay with that!
why is ACDC deciding this stuff pic.twitter.com/Z4SoDsn1VT
— nicole boyce (@nicolewboyce) April 15, 2021
6. They make dresses out of sacks?
What am I missing here?
Me, looking at sack dresses online: I wanna wear a sack
Me, when my expensive sack dress arrives: what the fuck this is a sack— Meredith Haggerty (@meredithaggerty) April 13, 2021
7. I can’t follow this advice.
I have a book addiction and I can’t lie about it.
Even if you’re fully vaccinated the CDC recommends finishing some of the books on your shelf before buying new ones
— CiCi Adams🌸 (@CiCiAdams_) April 10, 2021
8. Wait, it’s not?
I guess you learn something new every day.
My mom used to think that LGBT was a sandwich
— Makayla Anderson (@mnmakayla) May 11, 2016
9. Am I supposed to know who that is?
Not ringing a bell…
Parents love to break the news to you that someone you don't know passed away.
— Akilah Green (@akilahgreen) April 13, 2021
10. It starts to add up…
Just a drop in the bucket, right?
My toxic trait is saying to myself “it’s only $20” 1700 times a week
— Thomasina ❁🧞♀️ (@MissTommiDee) September 26, 2020
11. Seriously, what is wrong with those bears?
What have they been eating?
https://twitter.com/ambermruffin/status/1380933552691363842
12. You’ve never forgotten.
And you need to make sure no one else ever does, either…
In elementary school my team lost unfairly in a game of dodgeball because the other side hit our last man standing in the head and I challenged it and our PE teacher said “In a year you won’t remember this game” and I said “What’s the date?” and he said “April 11th.” Here we are.
— Bess Kalb (@bessbell) April 12, 2021
Okay, now it’s your turn.
In the comments, share some more funny tweets that you think we’ll love.
Let’s see what you can come up with!