Gentlemen. If you made it to adulthood and you still have guilty feelings about masturbation, it’s time to hang up your hangups. No longer is masturbating considered a shameful vice that will grow hair on your palms. In fact, not only is jackin’ it acceptable, it’s good for your prostate.

The Journal of European Urologyresults, (aka my favorite magazine, just renewed my subscription!), released the of an 18-year study that tracked the masturbatory frequency of 31,925 men. The study found that men who masturbated the most had a 33% lower chance of getting prostate cancer–and that’s not all. The researchers were also able to determine the magic number of times you should masturbate each month: 21.

That’s right, if you get busy six out of every seven days a week, your prostate will be just as happy as this plush one:

Photo Credit: I Am 8 Bit

Wait, why are you still reading this? You should be flogging the dolphin right now!

But since you are, the researchers aren’t quite sure why regular masturbation is good for your prostate. Ian Kerner, a psychotherapist and sex researcher, thinks it’s because ejaculation flushes out potentially harmful toxins and bacteria.

It’s also necessary to note that wanking alone isn’t enough to guarantee prostate health. Dr. James Balch stresses the importance of diet: “If a man wants to stay out of the operating room and avoid cancer of the prostate, he needs to go full blast to avoid the high-fat junk food and environment toxins that contribute to prostate problems,” he said.

Prostate-healthy foods are thought to include tomatoes, organic coffee, and plant-based fats.

Photo Credit: Etsy


Finally, it’s good for everyone to know the symptoms of prostate cancer. If you experience any of the following, it’s time to see your doctor: a need to urinate more frequently, an sudden urge resulting in rushing to the toilet, difficulty in starting to pee, straining to wee, weak flow and a feeling that your bladder has not emptied fully.

Now, what are you waiting for! Get out there* and start whackin’!


*And by that I mean stay inside, unless you wanna get arrested.


h/t: 9Gag and I Heart Intelligence