It never fails, does it? Husbands and wives going back and forth, making each other crazy and in love at the same time.
Hey, that’s life!
Let’s take a look at some hysterical tweets about married life in all its glory.
1. Can you please move?
My husband’s favorite place to stand is right in front of whatever cabinet I need.
— sixfootcandy (@sixfootcandy) September 3, 2019
2. How could you?
My wife just got mad at me for fast forwarding through a commercial because she wanted to use that time to look at her phone.
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) October 11, 2019
3. Not anymore…
Wife: is that what you’re wearing?
Me: I guess not.— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) February 3, 2019
4. Always listening.
I know it looks like my husband and I are eating in silence and ignoring each other, but we're eavesdropping on you so we can talk about you in the car.
— Some Boys' Mother (@someboysmother) May 29, 2019
5. An embarrassment to the family.
Please help. My husband just started running. He runs in jeans. With a belt. I don’t have anyone I can talk to about this. I am so alone.
— Tawny “My Name is Tawny” Newsome (@TrondyNewman) October 16, 2019
6. A lot of deep sighs.
Being married means never having to say you’re angry. You can clearly articulate it just by the way you breathe.
— Darla (@ddsmidt) January 16, 2019
7. Thank God for your wife.
Before marriage, I would sit at stop lights for hours because I had no one to tell me the light had changed to green.
— Chad Read (@squirrel74wkgn) February 8, 2019
8. I can’t pretend.
Husband: Could you have said that with a little less attitude?
Me: I could have but then I wouldn’t be the woman you married.
— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) November 17, 2019
9. I’ll sleep standing up tonight.
Wife laying diagonally across the middle of the bed.
Me: So… I’ll just stand over in the corner.
— Stone (@StoneAgeRadio13) January 30, 2019
10. A very confident man.
Oh to have the confidence of my husband who started a 2hr movie at 10:20pm.
— Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) February 16, 2019
11. You can die first.
My wife heard a noise downstairs and woke me up to go check it out. Because apparently my life doesn't matter.
— karanbir singh 🫶 (@karanbirtinna) August 24, 2019
12. From the grave.
https://twitter.com/DaddyGrownup/status/1174306861841080325?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1174306861841080325&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.huffpost.com%2Fentry%2Ffunniest-marriage-tweets-2019_l_5e0a3fb9e4b0843d360a6e03
13. Gonna be a shoot out.
Husband woke me up before my alarm.
We duel at sunset.
— *Lady V* (@tanbotha24) April 2, 2019
14. Has it really, though?
Me: I can’t believe we’ve been together for so long. The time has flown by.
Wife: Has it?
— Daddy’s Digest (@daddysdigest) March 31, 2019
15. That took a while.
[50 years from now]
*visiting husband’s grave*
“I wanted to let you know that after all these years I’ve finally figured out where I want to go to eat.”
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) February 25, 2019
Married life…you gotta love it!
Tell us a funny story about something your spouse has done recently. Let’s put them on blast!