We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again: there is a never-ending supply of hilarious women on Twitter who bring the funny on a regular basis.
Ready for another round from some hilarious women?
1. That’s pretty impressive.
My super power is looking at someone and knowing exactly what they owned from American Apparel in 2009
— Sarah Hagi (@geekylonglegs) November 17, 2019
2. Your choice…
Your choice for breakfast at the airport is a fourteen hundred calorie breakfast sandwich or half a napkin.
— Alison Leiby (@AlisonLeiby) November 22, 2019
3. No way in Hell.
No witch has all four:
-The cow as white as milk
-the cape as red as blood
-the hair as yellow as corn
-the slipper as pure as gold
— Orli Matlow (@HireMeImFunny) November 19, 2019
4. My life story.
what the hell did i do all day: a holiday memoir
— Kristen Arnett (@Kristen_Arnett) November 30, 2019
5. I wouldn’t say “like”…
Guy: can I get your number
Me: thanks but I'm a lesbian
Guy: oh so u like girls?
Me: I never said I liked them
— Rachel McCartney (@RachelMComedy) November 22, 2019
6. Why aren’t you covering this?
Hi, known feminist Amanda Palmer here, just wanted to know why your “newspaper” isnt covering the important news of the uterus I built out of accordions
— hunk 4 the holidays (@hunktears) November 21, 2019
7. Wait, it’s not…?
Imma tell my kids this was Jesus Christ pic.twitter.com/uZFHmKiaf4
— Whacktose Intolerant (@MillyTamarez) November 20, 2019
8. Better than ranch.
i deep conditioned with mayonnaise and now i’m being followed by a swarm of midwesterners
— taylor garron (@casualafro) November 21, 2019
9. Taking care of myself.
“It’s self care” -me having a nervous breakdown
— Alyssa Limperis (@alyssalimp) November 18, 2019
10. Drop the zero.
women posting their ugly boyfriends on Instagram like “what would I do without this goof” girl you would thrive that’s what you would do
— Abby Govindan (@abbygov) November 20, 2019
Pls don’t tell anyone ? but I want the duo lingo owl to dominate me ?
— Latina Fey (@yung_nihilist) November 20, 2019
12. Hahahaha. On point.
the new little women movie is the avengers for girls who came out as bi in the last two years
— Brandy Jensen (@BrandyLJensen) November 22, 2019
13. Seems simple enough.
Why is so hard to bump into a hot guy, drop all my stuff, accidentally trade phones, find out that he is a pop star, try to get his phone back to him, become a pop star in the process, finally give him back his phone and fall in love in this city?
— Rachel Sennott (@Rachel_Sennott) November 20, 2019
14. This is important.
If I ever go into a coma, please, and I can’t stress this enough, please wax my mustache
— lili michelle (@lilsmichelle) November 20, 2019
15. That’s kind of disturbing.
Me: I rode horses as a kid but I’m not one of those crazy horse girls or anything
Also me: pic.twitter.com/SEG62CoOud
— Kimberly ❄️Ice Princess ❄️ Dinaro (@KimberDin) November 18, 2019
LOLz for DAYz. Am I right?