For most of us, cross-stitching connotes wholesome, innocent fun–just like grandmas, who are most often associated with cross-stitching. My grandma made plenty of them, and her framed cross-stitches of lighthouses and sand pipers spruced up every room in her house without too much pizzazz.
But when it comes to wholesome things, there are some among us whose first impulse is to make them unwholesome. (I am one of this kind of people, and I am proud of it.) If you’re like me, the sight of a “Bless This Mess” cross-stitch instinctively makes you want to parody it.
Cross-stitching takes a lot of work, though, so I’ve never actually made one. But fortunately, lots of other people have! Originally compiled by Bored Panda, these 15 cross-stitches are perfect for anyone whose sensibilities are a bit skewed. Maybe don’t show them to grandma, though. (Unless that’s her sense of humor, in which case, go for it!)
1. Look at the pretty bird! Oh.
2. Sleep tight!
3. You can say whatever you want and nobody will get mad. That’s the magic of cross-stitch.
4. Next time, on Animal Planet.
5. A not-so-subtle way to tell someone to wash their hands more.
6. Love, millennial-style.
7. It’s hard to take the CEO seriously when you’ve seen him in his underwear.
8. Some artists use a paintbrush. She prefers the f-bomb.
9. It even works if the dog is imaginary!
10. It really does take a village.
11. Gotta keep things in perspective.
12. It hasn’t quite been a bumper crop.
13. Say it out loud.
14. This shit’s been passed down from generation to generation.
15. I never thought about it like that before!
h/t: Bored Panda