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19 of the Grossest Things Witnessed at a Supermarket

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What is one of the few things each and every person on this planet has in common? We all need to eat! And where do the vast majority of us get food? The supermarket. There are some truly bizarre people on this planet. Imagine what these people get up to in their friendly neighborhood supermarket?

These AskReddit users fill us in on some of their most exciting encounters.

#1. Witch

“There was an old lady snacking on frozen chicken legs while pushing her cart around. She had wild semi dreaded grey hair, layers of earth colored dresses, and a hunchback. That blew my ten year old mind. She really was a witch.”

#2. Jonesing For A Payout

“While working at Walmart, I watched a woman grab a jar of organic peanut butter, smash the glass bottle on the ground, and use the shards to cut her face. After slicing the [eff] out of her face, she ran up to my stunned ass and asked to see a manager. I walkie’ed somebody over and the manager rushed her into the office while asking me to call 911. Apparently she was an addict and jonesing hard. She figured the best thing to do was get hurt at Walmart so they would give her “a million dollars for pain and suffering”. Shockingly enough, Walmart didn’t pay out to the junkie that cut up her own face.”

#3. He Got Too Ballsy

“A homeless man was living in the corner of the garden center at Walmart. He set up camp behind the industrial shelves, stole a tent and was living there for a week. He was shoplifting all his supplies and food. He got ballsy and stole a George Foreman grill and was cooking a steak at 2am. FD was called for smoke in the building and found him behind the shelves. It was a pretty solid plan actually.”

#4. Some People Are NOT Meant To Be Parents

“There was a woman at Target yelling at her 5 year old son for crying and embarrassing her. I mean she was screaming things like, “YOU RUINED MY LIFE, YOU LITTLE SHIT” etc…luckily the manager told her to leave and called social services after she not-so-subtly threatened him.”

#5. The Weird Pickle

“A woman took off her underwear, hiked up her skirt, shat in a pickle barrel by the deli, then called the manager to complain about “the weird pickle”. Her hope was to sue the store but while she was out of view of employees, over a dozen customers saw it.”

#6. Turd Nugget

“I worked in a large supermarket a few years back and some guy came in, walked around the store, and every now and then dropped a nugget of turd by shaking his trousers. It happened 3 consecutive weeks before someone worked out who it was.”

#7. Hope They Helped, Buddy

“A fat guy hurried into the store who was beat red and sweating profusely. He rushed up to the counter with a few bottles of extra strength laxative. As soon as I finished scanning them he started chugging them. He paid cash and I handed him his receipt and change. He burped and pushed the receipt and now empty bottles towards me and calmly walked out of the store.”

#8. One Bite Is All You Need

“I’m a cashier and this guy walks up to my counter with a full roast chicken. I glance at him and continue checking out the person in front of me. When I look back, he’s gone. My manager comes sprinting up the aisle, picks up the chicken, shakes the container angrily and yells, “I KNEW IT, HE DID IT AGAIN.” I pull the container over and the guy had just taken a single bite out of the top of the chicken and left it. I have no idea how many times he’s done it but apparently enough for my manager to recognize him.”

#9. These Are Not Samples, Ma’am

“A really obese old lady at Walmart was just trying on deodorants and putting them back. I think she tried like 20 before she was satisfied to continue on without putting one in her cart.”

#10. Karma

“I worked in a small, local mini-market. There was an assistant manager there that none of us liked. He was incompetent, but really smarmy because his dad owned the company. One day, a known shoplifter comes in (a Roma Gypsy in her 60s), so he tracks her on the CCTV and sees her stash a bottle of expensive shampoo up her skirt. Delighted that he was going to catch her in the act and be a hero, he immediately went to confront her. Before he got to her she had obviously felt something was up and put the shampoo back. When he confronted her and said he knew she was hiding something, she whipped off her dress in one quick motion and stood there stark naked and challenged him to find the shampoo on her person. He looked simultaneously devastated and disgusted and told us afterwards that he could hear us all laughing in the security office from the shop floor!”