Our parents always told us to not talk to strangers. Well, unless they had money or candy. Then it was clearly okay. You have no idea how much money and candy I racked up. Chocolate chocolate kisses ya’ll!
As adults, we can make our own choices (SEE MOM!) even if there’s no money or candy involved. I’m generally a friendly person, but every now and again, I’ve had a situation like this come up where I wish I would have not left the house that day.
Sit back, relax and marvel at the awkwardness from these 13 people who had very uncomfortable moments with complete strangers.
13. Just change the channel
I was riding my motorcycle a month ago when the light ahead of me turned red. So I slowed down and stopped behind the car that was also waiting at the red light. A guy in sweatpants jogs out between me and the car, and for some reason, a TV remote flys out of his pocket and smashes like it was made of glass, all over the street.
The sheer randomness of a guy having a TV remote in his pocket made me burst out laughing, and the guy was staring at the shards of remote in the street like he didn’t know how it got in his pocket. I’m laughing so hard that I ease of my clutch a bit, and scare myself by moving forward an inch, causing me to stall my motorcycle out.
I can’t stop laughing, and now my motorcycle engine isn’t covering the sound. So the guy slowly looks up from the shattered remote and stares directly at me with this pained look on his face.
He does this until I stop laughing, fired my bike back up, and drove around him and down the street.
12. Kids poo the darndest things
I was doing my business in a stall while in a local wal-mart.
Anyways a little boy had to use the restroom and he started pulling on the door and said “Daddy the doors stuck!” and I said “somebodys in here.”
The little kid kept pulling on the door “I HAVE TO GO POOOOO!!” started screaming at me to get out then tried to crawl under the stall.
I had to put my foot on the top of his head to stop him from getting in.
oh God why….
11. Not exactly a “cute meet.”
On the first day of the semester I was walking on campus, and one of my hands kind of swung into this stranger’s penis, cupping it for a second.
We made eye contact and then quickly walked away from each other.
When I get to class, I find out he is my TA.
I never went in for extra help.
I have a minor social phobia. I was on the bus the other day, and I decided that I want to live my life, goddammit. I wanted to just start a conversation with a stranger, and I didn’t know how. This woman and I were the only two people on the bus. I had this comic in my head, and I figured the best thing I could do was just be honest.
I looked at her and said,
“Isn’t it funny how we’re so afraid to just begin a conversation with another human being?”
She just stared at me.
So to answer my own question – yes, it is funny, in a very tragic way.
9. Stop following me!
Ended up going to a gas station and filled up my car while this older guy was there doing the same.
We both drove off and ended up at a Starbucks about 2 miles away.
We then both ended up at the gym and ran a few treadmills apart.
We both knew.
It was awkward.