People are disgusting, filthy animals. No one knows this more than the landlords of the world. Below are some tales that will make laugh, shake your head, and recoil in horror at the things people get up to in their own homes.
1. Chickens and Swimming Pools
Buddy of mine owned a 3 story house. Got a call from the 2nd floor tenants that water was coming though his roof. He went to the 3rd floor and when the tenants opened the door he could see one of those blow up swimming pools in the living room. Not the little ones mind you but one of the big 24 inch deep ones. As if this wasn’t shocking enough, the tenant had also removed all the kitchen cabinet doors and replaced them with chicken wire and had a dozen chickens living in them.
1. Human. Poop. Everywhere. We had a tenant in a 40 year old apartment complex who was a hoarder or something. This person was evicted for failure to comply with certain provisions of their lease, and when we went to inspect, the smell was unbearable. There was poop in every plumbing fixture. The toilet was full and overflowing, the bathroom sink was full, the bathtub was half full, the kitchen sink… Everywhere. There was a pile of cigarette butts on the kitchen counter, they’d just stub them out on the counter. We couldn’t rent that unit for a while.
2. The cat lady This was in a top floor 1 bedroom apartment of about 650 square feet. We got complaints about the smell emanating from this apartment. Upon inspection, we found a sea of cats living there with two people. Dozens of cats. When we called animal control, it took every truck in the city several trips. The final count? 62 cats? I love cats, but that’s too much.
3. I mean…WHAT?!
I’ve got some good ones for this.
Had a whole house being rented. Evicted tenant. Went to clean up after they left and this was the basement. They had a dog that went in the basement to crap. Instead of cleaning it up they poured latex paint on it to seal in the smell. The dog kept crapping and they kept pouring. A latex-dog poo lasagna filling an entire room. The floor was a mound about 4ft high and 10ft wide, filling the entire basement, of nothing but layers of latex paint and dog crap from several years of them living there. Took air hammers and chisels and weeks of work to clean.
Once we got that done we were able to get the the storage closet in the basement. It was jammed shut from this crap on the floor but the door had a hole in the top. They used this closed off room with the hole as a diaper disposal for their infant. A room about 4ftx4ft filled to the top with years of dirty baby diapers.
4. Over the line!
1. They refused to pay the electric bill, and then after we had their electricity disconnected, they used a long pole to reconnect it.
2. They burned their own house down in a fit of rage
5. Not a landlord, but…
I’m not a landlord but in my lease was an agreement to not have a pool inside the apartment nor could we build a campfire or horde goats in the apartment. To think there is a reason that these specifically are in a lease amazes me.
I had a tenant pour concrete down the drains. There was no repair possible. It was literally more cost-effective to demolish, salvage what we could and rebuild. It even got into the septic system and we had to settle with the city for damaging their infrastructure. Biggest nightmare ever. We sued the former tenants, but when you’re suing a scumbag, best case scenario, you might get a 1990 Toyota Tercel.
Tenants are pretty decent as a whole, but if you have to evict, it’s worth it to just offer them a couple hundred dollars cash to move out while you’re there and can watch the whole process.